"Or do your own grandmother to become your own grandfather, then watch as your species is crushed under the rule of a totalitarian egomaniac,"

"My grandmother is not a totalitarian egomaniac!"

"Wait, what? That's not what I said. What the hell are you talking about?"

"The future is a utopia. I've seen it. I've been there,"

"Well, I don't know what parallel universe you stumbled into after an all-night 'kegger' - but the one I saw made a T-rex look like a kitten with a bottle of warm milk mixed with equal parts of tequila. And that ain't a T-rex, let me tell you.

"When did you travel to? Wait, how are you even able to travel in time at all?"

"How do you do it?"

"I have super-powers,"

"Community college,"

"You got a two year degree in time travel?"